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Chad M.
This thing is dangerous. My dog put it on, sighed deeply, and muttered, ‘I have seen too much.’ They now only respond to questions with cryptic riddles. I fear what they know.
Oliver K.
It’s cute, but I’d rather have one that generates its own gravitational pull so my dog becomes a tiny planet. I want people orbiting them at the dog park.
Daniel P.
I put this on my dog, and suddenly they were strutting through the house like they had an empire to run. I fear I’ve created a fashion dictator.
Lisa C.
I bought this, and now my dog acts like they have their own Netflix special. They command attention. They demand admiration. They are the moment.
Courtney S.
Absolutely adorable, but I wish it came in a galaxy print with tiny planets and stars that glow when my dog barks. Is that too much to ask?
George W.
This thing is dangerously stylish. My dog now looks too important to acknowledge me. The other day, they sighed dramatically when I spoke. I have been humbled.
Jerome W.
My dog wore this, and a random man in a suit stopped us on the street and said, ‘Ah, we’ve been expecting you.’ Then he vanished. My dog just winked.
Lucinda M.
This thing is too powerful. My dog put it on, and suddenly I received a text from an unknown number: ‘You are now under their command.’ I looked up. My dog nodded.
Gregory B.
This is great, but when will you release the self-aware, mood-sensing version that changes color based on my dog’s emotional state? I need to know when they’re plotting against me.
Handcrafted. Dog-approved. Outrageously Stylish.
Each of our products is carefully designed using premium materials, because we believe every dog deserves to strut their stuff in comfort and style. Our expert crafters (who may or may not be under the direct supervision of very judgmental dogs) ensure that every stitch, seam, and detail meets the highest canine fashion standards.
Whether your pup is a Pocket Wolf or a full-blown Horse?, we’ve got sizes to fit all floofy icons. And yes, we tested these on real dogs. No, they did not sign NDAs. Yes, they now demand royalties in the form of extra belly rubs.
Why Your Dog Needs This…
- Handcrafted with love (and a little bit of dog hair, free of charge)
- Premium, comfy materials because only the best for your fashion icon
- Eco-friendly whenever possible, because a cleaner planet means more squirrels to chase
- Tested on real dogs (who now think they’re famous)
- Designed for maximum zoomie compatibility
- Guaranteed to make strangers gasp, ‘Oh my gosh, look at that dog!’
- Fits all sizes, from ‘Pocket Wolf’ to ‘Horse?’
Legend speaks of a dog so well-dressed, so impeccably styled, that heads turned, traffic stopped, and pigeons whispered in awe. That dog could be yours. Choose wisely.

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If you email us at 2am, know that we’re awake too. Staring. Waiting.
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Product # | BS-88 |
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Weight | Lighter than your dog’s sense of responsibility. |
Sustainability | 100% guilt-free materials – your dog is basically an eco-warrior now. |
Durability | Tougher than a dog’s refusal to come inside when they’re having fun. |
Style Rating | Certified 12/10 on the ‘Oh my gosh, look at that dog!’ scale. |
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Fetchability | While not made for playing fetch, your dog will attempt to fetch it anyway. |
Cuteness | So cute your dog’s about to have an influencer career. |
Availability | Limited – once people see it, they panic-buy for their dog’s fashion legacy. |
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