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Timothy J.
Before this, my dog was just a normal pup. Now? They walk with purpose, like they have a TED Talk to give and a legacy to leave behind.
Bert H.
This item arrived with no return address. No tracking. No memory of ordering it. But when I put it on my dog, a deep voice echoed through my house: ‘You have chosen wisely.’
Barbara Q.
I put this on my dog, and now they communicate exclusively through slow, knowing nods. They haven’t barked in three days. The air feels different. Something is coming.
Bruce K.
I dressed my dog in this, and immediately, a limo pulled up outside. A driver stepped out. ‘They’re ready,’ he said. My dog gave me one last glance and left.
Debbie H.
I put this on my dog, and now they walk with an air of importance. The neighbor’s dog, who used to ignore them, now looks mildly intimidated. This was a power move.
Nathan W.
Amazing quality, love it, but where’s the tie-dye psychedelic swirling dreamscape edition? I need my dog to look like they just escaped from the ‘70s.
Janet F.
I bought this and suddenly my dog has appointments. They get letters addressed to ‘The High Chancellor of Barkonia.’ The mailman bows when he delivers them. I don’t know what’s happening, but I’ve started addressing my dog as ‘Your Grace’ just to be safe.
Handcrafted. Dog-approved. Outrageously Stylish.
Each of our products is carefully designed using premium materials, because we believe every dog deserves to strut their stuff in comfort and style. Our expert crafters (who may or may not be under the direct supervision of very judgmental dogs) ensure that every stitch, seam, and detail meets the highest canine fashion standards.
Whether your pup is a Pocket Wolf or a full-blown Horse?, we’ve got sizes to fit all floofy icons. And yes, we tested these on real dogs. No, they did not sign NDAs. Yes, they now demand royalties in the form of extra belly rubs.
Why Your Dog Needs This…
- Handcrafted with love (and a little bit of dog hair, free of charge)
- Premium, comfy materials because only the best for your fashion icon
- Eco-friendly whenever possible, because a cleaner planet means more squirrels to chase
- Tested on real dogs (who now think they’re famous)
- Designed for maximum zoomie compatibility
- Guaranteed to make strangers gasp, ‘Oh my gosh, look at that dog!’
- Fits all sizes, from ‘Pocket Wolf’ to ‘Horse?’
Legend speaks of a dog so well-dressed, so impeccably styled, that heads turned, traffic stopped, and pigeons whispered in awe. That dog could be yours. Choose wisely.
Free shipping
Faster than your dog when they hear the fridge open.
Contact us 24/7
If you email us at 2am, know that we’re awake too. Staring. Waiting.
30-Day Returns
Your dog changed their mind? We get it, and we're ready.
100% Secure Payment
We protect your payment like a dog guards their favorite toy.
| Product # | BS-9 |
|---|---|
| Weight | Lighter than your dog’s sense of responsibility. |
| Sustainability | 100% guilt-free materials – your dog is basically an eco-warrior now. |
| Durability | Tougher than a dog’s refusal to come inside when they’re having fun. |
| Style Rating | Certified 12/10 on the ‘Oh my gosh, look at that dog!’ scale. |
|---|---|
| Fetchability | While not made for playing fetch, your dog will attempt to fetch it anyway. |
| Cuteness | So cute your dog’s about to have an influencer career. |
| Availability | Limited – once people see it, they panic-buy for their dog’s fashion legacy. |
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More bow ties to get your paws on.
The ‘Bark GQ’ Velvet Bowtie
The ‘Professor Woof’ Bowtie
The Pawtriotic Bowtie
