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Stephanie Q.
Love it! But I NEED a version that plays dramatic theme music every time my dog enters a room. Bonus points if it comes with a built-in fog machine.
Olivia S.
I thought this would just be a cute addition, but I wasn’t prepared for the power it holds. My dog gives smoldering looks now. It’s… unsettling.
Ben F.
My dog put this on, turned to me, and I swear I saw wisdom in their eyes. I no longer own them. They own me. What a transformation.
Gregory B.
This is great, but when will you release the self-aware, mood-sensing version that changes color based on my dog’s emotional state? I need to know when they’re plotting against me.
Bradley T.
Put this on my dog, and suddenly they have opinions. They no longer simply eat their food—they critique it. They give me judgmental looks when I wear sweatpants. This was not in the fine print.
Handcrafted. Dog-approved. Outrageously Stylish.
Each of our products is carefully designed using premium materials, because we believe every dog deserves to strut their stuff in comfort and style. Our expert crafters (who may or may not be under the direct supervision of very judgmental dogs) ensure that every stitch, seam, and detail meets the highest canine fashion standards.
Whether your pup is a Pocket Wolf or a full-blown Horse?, we’ve got sizes to fit all floofy icons. And yes, we tested these on real dogs. No, they did not sign NDAs. Yes, they now demand royalties in the form of extra belly rubs.
Why Your Dog Needs This…
- Handcrafted with love (and a little bit of dog hair, free of charge)
- Premium, comfy materials because only the best for your fashion icon
- Eco-friendly whenever possible, because a cleaner planet means more squirrels to chase
- Tested on real dogs (who now think they’re famous)
- Designed for maximum zoomie compatibility
- Guaranteed to make strangers gasp, ‘Oh my gosh, look at that dog!’
- Fits all sizes, from ‘Pocket Wolf’ to ‘Horse?’
Legend speaks of a dog so well-dressed, so impeccably styled, that heads turned, traffic stopped, and pigeons whispered in awe. That dog could be yours. Choose wisely.
Free shipping
Faster than your dog when they hear the fridge open.
Contact us 24/7
If you email us at 2am, know that we’re awake too. Staring. Waiting.
30-Day Returns
Your dog changed their mind? We get it, and we're ready.
100% Secure Payment
We protect your payment like a dog guards their favorite toy.
| Product # | BS-13 |
|---|---|
| Weight | Lighter than your dog’s sense of responsibility. |
| Sustainability | 100% guilt-free materials – your dog is basically an eco-warrior now. |
| Durability | Tougher than a dog’s refusal to come inside when they’re having fun. |
| Style Rating | Certified 12/10 on the ‘Oh my gosh, look at that dog!’ scale. |
|---|---|
| Fetchability | While not made for playing fetch, your dog will attempt to fetch it anyway. |
| Cuteness | So cute your dog’s about to have an influencer career. |
| Availability | Limited – once people see it, they panic-buy for their dog’s fashion legacy. |
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More bow ties to get your paws on.
The ‘Bark GQ’ Velvet Bowtie
The ‘Professor Woof’ Bowtie
The Pawtriotic Bowtie
